Superiority — a short story

Posted on 2018 June 24


superior [detail] snob




“Are you ready?”

“For what?”

“The next natural disaster. They always happen eventually. I’m fully prepared to handle anything.”

“Good for you.”

“So have you made preparations?”

“Let’s see, I’ve got extra food and water, flashlights—”

“But is it enough?”

“Well, I can’t be sure I’ve thought of every—”

“It’s never enough!”

“How do you know?”

“Because nobody is ready. I’ve talked to lots of people, and I’ve learned that I’m the only one truly prepared. I’m way ahead of everyone else. It’s ridiculous. But people don’t listen. They should do more, but they won’t. It’s a travesty.”

“Why won’t they listen?”

“I guess because they’re lazy.”

“And foolish and stupid?”

“Frankly … yes.”

“Well, then, I can save you some trouble. I was gonna ask what else I should do. But there’s no point in telling me because I’m foolish and stupid and just won’t get it. In fact, you don’t have to go to the trouble of informing anyone, because they’re all too dumb to appreciate your warning.”

“Look, someone ought to tell people that they’re being fools.”

“Nah. You’re off the hook! You have no moral responsibility to speak up if we’re all idiots. You might as well relax and enjoy your … how shall we put it? … superiority. It reminds me of an old saying, that one of the benefits of going to Heaven is that you can lean over the ramparts and look down at the lesser souls squirming in Hell.”

“What are you getting at?”

“Just saying.”

“I don’t think I like you very much.”

“The feeling’s mutual. Have a nice day.”